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Friday Smacktalk: Smew Stinks

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Sometimes smacktalk writes itself; like when SMU's strength is its 120-ranked defense.

Ronald Martinez - Getty Images

Ignorant Frogs that we are, it's easy to hate on SMU. They are still trying to buy their way into the football gods' good graces, after buying their way out of them in the '80s.

So here's to money well spent.

What is SMU's greedy green grass getting for them these days, besides a hobbit's horse for a mascot and the gayest marching band in Texas?

It's bought them a last-ranked defense. And (no surprise) a last-ranked pass defense.

Sure my little pony went all the way to Estonia to buy a great punt blocker, but for punting its own failed drives, it's almost the worst in the nation. SMU returns punts about like average, but it's almost as bad at kickoff returns as it is punting.

All that money has bought the crimson and blue a bad rush defense, and a worse rushing offense, which barely tops 100 yards per game. Zach Line is good, but he's not as good as a team effort.

The dough from Dallas bought SMU a bad quarterback, and bad pass protection.

In short, if TCU doesn't beat the spread, and although one could say that would mean the Horned Frogs played down to their competition, that would be going too far with the insults in a smacktalk post.

Rock 'em, Froggies. The Skillet hasn't been held by a worse outfit since 2008.