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Frogs O War Theater: The Hunt for the Ole Miss Mascot

Before the team gets down to the serious business of winning the Peach Bowl, the Frogs O' War Staff gathered together to provide the team with motivation.

The Peach Bowl is almost upon us, and we've had our usual fun with a couple of nice previews of the rebs, some coverage of TCU's pre-bowl practice and a Q&A with the enemy from Marshall.  Pretty much what you'd expect from any team blog, but it would be a disservice if you thought that was all we were doing to get ready for Ole Miss.  Oh no, my friends, it's time for a look behind the curtain into the inner workings of Frogs O' War- as we head into the Frogs O' War War Room for the first time in a while for... The Hunt for the Ole Miss mascot.

(If you aren't familiar with Frogs O' War Theater, feel free to check out previous episodes: The Tech Problem (Texas Tech), Hello Mr. Anderson (Texas), Attack on Tigers (LSU) and the originator- the OBNUG Blog Bet (Boise State).)

December 23rd, 2014

Frogs O' War War Room (Double the war of any other War Room): HawkeyedFrog, Jamie Plunkett, Marshall Weber, CoachMelissa and SuperFrog have gathered once again to discuss ways to ensure victory over the Ole Miss Rebels.

Marshall: It seems like it's been forever since we actually had a war room meeting.

Jamie: It's Hawk's job to call them, he must've been slacking off again.

Hawk: I could've called it earlier if you'd just gotten the keys to the War Room from Fungo when he put you in charge.

Jamie: Do you know how hard I had to work just to get the password to the Youtube account?

Melissa: Didn't you say you were going to put up the game films from the other TCU games on there?

Jamie: Vaguely, but what I really remember is Hawk saying he was going to do film review posts...

: Stop your bickering, we're here to talk about Ole Miss.

FoW Staff as one: Yes sir.

: That's better, now the issue at hand is that after the playoff kerfuffle has passed and left us out...

Marshall: Hey, about that, didn't you, Hawk and Jamie said that you had that covered?

Hawk: Just... don't ask.  We'll tell you about it next week*.

: The issue is the team may be disappointed about not making the playoff, and even great teams can come out flat if they think they deserved better.

Jamie: He's right, guys.  Remember when we came out flat against Louisiana Tech after we missed the Fiesta Bowl?

Hawk: Or the time Cal was so bummed about missing the Rose Bowl they actually lost to Tech?

Jamie: The wife says that's the greatest moment in Tech football history, apart from that one time they beat Texas to be first place in the Big 12.

Melissa: . . . For a week?

Jamie: It's... not a great history.

: So in order to make sure that a similar fate doesn't befall us, we need something to get the team motivated to play against Ole Miss.

Jamie: They did beat us in baseball this year to knock us out of the College World Series.

Hawk: That's not bad, but it implies that people care about baseball when the football team is doing well.

Marshall: Plus we did thump them in basketball at their place to make up for that.

: Eh, we'll put it in the maybe pile.  What else we got?

Melissa: Well, what else do we even know about them?  They're in the SEC.

Hawk: That's pretty hateable, everyone wants to beat the SEC.

Jamie: But they did thump A&M in College Station, that was actually pretty nice of them.

: Fine, another one for the maybe pile.  What's specific to Ole Miss that we can motivate the team with?

Marshall: What about their mascot?  I mean, they're the rebels.  The whole Confederate thing is pretty... yeah.

Hawk: They did have to stop their band from playing "From Dixie with Love" because some fans wouldn't stop shouting something really... yeah.

Jamie: That was years ago, you know.  They've even got a new mascot.

: We'll chalk the chant up to a few bad apples, but last I heard they were still "The Rebels"?  What's this new mascot thing?

Melissa: Didn't they go Star Wars with it?

Hawk: Don't think so, that's all kinds of royalty money that they'd prefer to use on recruiting.

Jamie: You mean limos and helicopters for the coaching staff and that sort of thing?

Hawk: Um... Yeah.  Something like that.

: Nothing was proven, chalk it up to a few bad apples again if you like.  If it's not the giant "It's a Trap!" Crawfish, what is the mascot?

Marshall: They keep talking about Landsharks over at Red Cup Rebellion, maybe that's the new mascot?

Jamie: I saw some mockups, but haven't seen anyone in costume.

Hawk: They do that hand thing though?  You know, the one like Curly did whenever Moe's back was turned?

: Well, some folks were just late hopping aboard the hand signal train, I guess.  Chalk it up to a few too many refreshing beverages, or maybe a Three Stooges marathon.  So it's a shark, then?  I guess they're a little hateable.

Jamie: People do tend to hate sharks, no getting around it.  I don't know that it'll be enough to get the team fired up to play, though.

Hawk: Guys...

Marshall: Back to the baseball thing then?

Hawk: Guys...

Melissa: The SEC?

Hawk: Guys...

Jamie: Racist songs?

Hawk: Guys!  I found the mascot.

Jamie: Yeah, it's a shark.  No big deal there.

Hawk: No... it's far worse than that.

Marshall: It's just a mascot, how bad can it be?

Hawk: It's... a bear.

*Silence falls over the War Room*

Jamie: You're kidding me.

Hawk: No, it's a bear.

Melissa: What do bears have to do with rebelling?

Hawk: I don't know, but the mascot is a freakin' bear.

Marshall: It's perfect, I'll tell the team right away.

*Exit Marshall*

Melissa: And they voted to be represented by a bear.  Simply unconscionable.

*Exit Melissa*

Jamie: Boss?  A few bad apples?  A few drinks too many?

: I can forgive a lot of things, Jamie.  Beating our team in baseball?  Sure.  Three Stooge-ish hand signals?  Fine.  Paying recruits?  As long as you pay them more than Alabama.

Hawk: Troubling chants?

: Enough time has passed since then that we can let that slide too.  Pretty forgiving, wouldn't you say?

Hawk: You're a better Frog than I, sir.

: You're damned right.  Even selection committees have some redeeming values- every poll except the last one, for example.

Jamie: Dang, boss.  Not even the bigs at Brite Divinity forgave that.  So do we write the Ole Miss guys off as just misunderstood?

: Something like that, Jamie.  Meeting adjourned.

*Exit Jamie Plunkett*

: Hawk?

Hawk: Yes sir?

: Tell the team I want the full Texas Tech treatment.  Leave no survivors.

Hawk: With pleasure, sir.