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Did Y’all See That? Week Three Edition

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In this week’s edition, we play golf with the USC Trojans and travel to the money pit that is Florida football.

Washington v Utah
Jake Browning had himself a game.
Photo by Gene Sweeney Jr/Getty Images

There were quite a bit of things to see in Week Three of college football. There were also quite a bit of things not to see, like Scott Frost’s Nebraska losing to Troy and Alabama putting Ole Miss in a body bag and throwing it into the Gulf of Mexico. That game tape is a snuff film, and whoever watches it should be monitored around the clock.

But let’s not focus on the negatives. It’s time to ask the most important question in sports this week: Did Y’all See That?

Did Y’all See: How many rushing yards USC racked up against Texas?

Marcus Allen. Reggie Bush. LenDale White. O.J. Simpson (grimaces, sighs). The Trojans may be more known for their quarterbacks in recent years, but they have a legacy of producing amazing running backs. So when USC traveled to Austin Saturday, you wouldn’t be faulted for expecting the Trojans to pave the way on the ground.

Let’s head over to the invaluable sports-reference.com and see how that went!

Hmm. That’s weird. Computer — enhance!

Oh no. Oh no, no, no. The dreaded double hyphen.

USC registered negative five yards rushing against Texas. Positive spin: they were five strokes under par, and would’ve tied for sixth with Tiger Woods in the Open Championship this year. Negative spin: the Trojans are bad.

Did Y’all See: This throw from Jake Browning?

As the leader of the “Jake Browning is Actually Good” Fan Club, it pains me deeply to show you this video.

Do you remember the moment you panicked the most during an athletic competition? I do. I once was so wide open in the corner on a fast break for a three-pointer freshman year of high school that I rushed everything and didn’t set my feet, so my right foot slipped and I wound up sending the ball off the side of the backboard and out of bounds. I turned and both my dad and grandpa were in the stands trying to stifle laughter. My teammates on the bench didn’t bother stifling.

Jake Browning and I are basically the same person, is what I’m saying.

Did Y’all See: Purdue’s point differential?

After losing to Missouri, the Purdue Boilermakers are now 0-3, which is a wildly disappointing start for a team that many predicted to be sneakily competitive in the Big 10 East. However, Purdue is No. 54 in the incomparable S&P+ Ratings by SB Nation’s Bill Connelly. The Boilermakers are ahead of notable teams like 3-0 California, 2-1 Baylor and 2-1 Louisville.

How can this be? Well — Purdue’s point differential is -8. That’s not the margin of defeat against Mizzou. That’s the entire differential on the Boilermakers’ season. They lost to Northwestern 31-27, lost to Eastern Michigan 20-19 and lost to Mizzou 40-37.

Let’s look live at the face that most Purdue fans are making:

Purdue v Rutgers
THE HORROR
Photo by Rich Schultz/Getty Images

Did Y’all See: That Syracuse is undefeated and just whooped Florida State?

This game was on in the 11 a.m. block, so you’d be forgiven if you were busy starting up a barbecue or watching another game or sneaking in an early-morning nap, the most hallowed of all naps.

But — Syracuse cooked and ate Florida State and washed it down with a nice glass of Chianti. The Orange won 30-7 and out-gained the Seminoles 441-240. They had 222 rushing yards against Florida State’s 62! That’s a very weird thing to happen considering that Syracuse is under Dino Babers, a disciple of Art Briles’ passing game scheme. The Orange are now 3-0 and could move to 4-0 with a win over UConn next week.

Florida State might not make a bowl this year. Maybe Jimbo Fisher really was worth the $75 million that Texas A&M gave him! (Note: he is not, because nobody is.)

Did Y’all See: Why Florida had to play Colorado State?

The Florida Gators dismantled Colorado State Saturday. There’s a very specific reason those two teams squared off: it was legally required.

In order to steal away head coach Jim McElwain from Colorado State in 2014, Florida AD Jeremy Foley agreed to pay the Rams $2 million to come to Florida for a game this season. That’s more than a fair price for McElwain, an up-and-coming coach who is sure to take the Gators to great heig—ah, well, nevermind, they fired him in the offseason and still had to pay him $7.5 million to leave.

Then again, the Gators might be satisfied with paying $2 million for a win this season. It ain’t like they’re going to do much else.