It’s the Tuesday after Labor Day. You’ve just spent the past three days binge-watching college football, drinking (if you choose to imbibe) and gambling (if you choose to wager) during games and trying to fit in time to do something outdoors to feel better about yourself. When you walked into work this morning and gathered around the coffeepot with your coworkers, it’s almost a guarantee somebody asked you: “Did y’all see [INSERT MOMENT HERE]?”
That’s the inspiration behind a new weekly segment we’re calling “Did Y’all See That?” Every Tuesday, I’ll bring you an assortment of five things from around college football that you can use to start a conversation. Maybe one will be a funny gif. Maybe one will be an eye-popping stat line. Maybe one will be a big play from, say, a Texas game (kidding, Texas’ offense can’t generate big plays).
Got it? Good. Let’s get going!
Did Y’all See: Ed Oliver decimate Rice?
Ed Oliver, noted Houston defensive tackle and human version of the giant rock rumbling after Indiana Jones in Raiders of the Lost Ark, was receiving preseason hype levels normally reserved for Notre Dame quarterbacks and Texas head football coaches. Sure, he was an unstoppable force last year, but offensive lines will be keying in on him all season. Surely he can’t replicate his 2017 performance, right? Let’s check in on Oliver’s stats after the first quarter in Houston’s season opener against Rice:
First quarter for Ed Oliver:— Joseph Duarte (@Joseph_Duarte) September 1, 2018
7 tackles (5 solo)
3 tackles for loss#Heisman
At one point, Rice had ran five offensive plays, and Oliver had four tackles, two of which were for losses. He finished with 13 tackles (five solo, three and a half for losses) and two quarterback pressures.
Do not mess with Ed Oliver.
Did Y’all See: That NC State fan?
Hey, this is a family website, but y’all gotta check out this semi-NSFW gif.
omg the nc state fan on the right pic.twitter.com/yXNcTQ5y0T— Jordan Heck (@JordanHeckFF) September 1, 2018
Our mothership site already wrote at length about this work of art, so I’ll refrain from writing all 2,000 words of love and adoration I have for this particular Wolfpack fan. I’d marry her in a heartbeat.
Did Y’all See: LSU might actually have a quarterback, except actually maybe LSU doesn’t have a quarterback?
LSU suffocated Miami Sunday night in a game that was painful to watch at many points. The Tigers built up a 27-3 lead at the half on the strength of a powerful run game and a pick-six, and then just sat and preserved energy while the Canes mounted a half-hearted comeback attempt in the second half.
For some reason, a bunch of people on Twitter took all that to mean that LSU had finally found a quarterback in Joe Burrow, an Ohio State transfer. This is a representative tweet of many reactions from fans during the game:
Shea Patterson transfers from the SEC to the B10 and struggles.— Haskins SZN (@vettxev013) September 3, 2018
Joe Burrow transfers from the B10 to the SEC and makes it look easy.
But yeah, B10 is weak and soft.
Judging by that, what would you guess Burrow’s stat line was from Sunday night? Say, three touchdowns, 250 yards passing, maybe an efficient 17-23 or so?
Burrow went 11-24 for 140 yards and no touchdowns.
Let’s just say I’m not convinced.
Did Y’all See: Washington fall apart in clutch situations?
Chris Peterson, formerly of the Boise State Broncos and now with the Washington Huskies, is widely regarded as one of the better coaches in college football. Jake Browning, UW’s quarterback, is often maligned, but is an experienced starter who will make an NFL roster.
So, uh, Washington — what on earth was that against Auburn? Here are the results of the Huskies’ second-half appearances in the red zone: missed field goal, fumble, field goal after having 1st and Goal at the 10. That type of non-execution is shocking from a Peterson-coached team.
On its last drive of the game, Washington had the ball in Auburn territory with two minutes or so left. These were the next two plays:
Big Kat Bryant, SACK!!! pic.twitter.com/gKc0iKOdR2— Power of Dixieland (@PwrofDixieland) September 1, 2018
Auburn sent the house following a Big Kat sack. The Auburn defense smelled blood and they all saw this play as a race to the football. They all won. pic.twitter.com/MTZmanLwng— Zac Blackerby (@Zblackerby) September 2, 2018
I’ve seen better composure and awareness at a middle school dance where all the boys gather on one side and all the girls gather on the other. Washington isn’t out of the Playoff race yet, but they’ll need to perform better when it counts.
(Also, the names of the two Auburn players that made those sacks were Big Kat Bryant and Smoke Monday. Hell yeah, man.)
Did Y’all See: Michigan fans have a meltdown?
Michigan and Notre Dame faced off in South Bend Saturday in one of the most highly-anticipated games of Week One. It did not go well for the Wolverines, who looked anemic on offense and let Notre Dame receivers climb over them for big catch after big catch.
Luckily, we have the fine folks at MGoBlog, the nation’s premier source for rational Michigan college football takes, to break down the game for us.
I really hope that’s a play off of “enthusiasm unknown to mankind.”
Luckily, one Michigan fan brought us all back to reality.
Truer words have never been spoken.