Dear Jalen

Author’s note: Open letters are the most pernicious form of online writing, a lazy template used to make an article seem more meaningful and heartfelt than it actually is. I hate them.

With that said, here is an open letter to a certain transfer quarterback.

Dear Jalen Hurts,

Rumors are swirling that you’re interested in attending Texas Christian University for graduate school, and possibly playing a little football on the side. Rumors are flying that TCU is very interested in you coming to Fort Worth as well. Rumors are [insert other cliche verb here] that TCU fans are extremely fired up about that happening, and through conversations I’ve had, I can confirm at least that last part.

I’m not surprised that there are other schools you’re considering, and I’m not surprised they’re considering you. Oklahoma has an okay football program, so I’ve been told. You could even turn the screw in Alabama’s side and transfer to Auburn, where they run an offense that would admittedly be perfect for you.

Some people also think you should go to Maryland and follow your former offensive coordinator Mike Locksley. Jalen, do you really want to be seen in these uniforms and these helmets?

Photo by Will Newton/Getty Images

Think it through, buddy.

You’re used to playing with an outstanding defense with the Crimson Tide against all teams not named Clemson. Well, guess what? TCU perennially has one of the best, if not the best, defenses in the Big 12. And the Frogs don’t even play Clemson anytime soon. It’s a win-win!

TCU has won its final game of the season three of the last four years. Can Alabama say that? Can Oklahoma? The answer, my friend, is no. Were those TCU games in the College Football Playoff? That’s not important right now, and I’ll thank you not to ask.

Transfer quarterbacks have had success at TCU. Kenny Hill won an Alamo Bowl, and certainly didn’t get any stick from any fans during his time with the Frogs, nope, not at all. You can carry on his legacy!

Late in the year, the Frogs showed an ability to implement the sort of spread power run game that you’d thrive in. Imagine having a choice between handing off to Darius Anderson/Sewo Olonilua, keeping it yourself, or pulling up and throwing to Jalen Reagor. Heck, you guys already have the same first name! How fun is that? Oklahoma and Auburn can’t offer that.

You’re a Texas guy — you went to Channelview High near Houston. This is your home state. TCU has a Whataburger within walking distance of campus. You’d fit right in, even if half of the student body is from California and Colorado and all those other hippie states.

Have you heard about the BLUU? Buddy, the cafeteria at the BLUU is amazing. You can get chocolate milk at 4 p.m. any day of the week! And every now and then they’ll bring in exotic meats. I even tried what was supposedly kangaroo there one time. (It made me physically sick for two days. Don’t eat the kangaroo, at least not before a game.)

Bryant-Denny Stadium at Alabama is huge, with over 100,000 people. Gaylord Family Oklahoma Memorial Stadium holds around 86,000, and Jordan-Hare Stadium in Auburn is at 87,000. Don’t all those people kinda make you feel small? Amon G. Carter Stadium packs in around 50,000 fans on a good day, or 35,000 if the Frogs are playing Kansas. You’ll feel like the biggest man in the whole place!

Jalen, you’ve had a wonderful career at Alabama, and by all accounts have been a tremendous teammate even after ceding your starting role to Tua. You could come to TCU and not play a single snap, and the Frogs’ locker room would be better off for it.

But of course, if you want to take one or two or seven hundred snaps, that’s more than fine with us, too.

Keep in touch.

Your pal,

Grant